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Expand Toronto sex expert and professional dominatrix Lady Pim. Despite a growing number of dating apps like Bumble encouraging women to make the first move, it can still be hard for women to feel confident and proactive in their dating lives.
Before we get into dating tips, how did you enter the world of BDSM?
Dating doms, 5 things you must watch out for as a 'submissive' seeking your first 'dom/domme'
Lady Pim: I started dating doms being a top 10 years ago as it became a necessity for me. I still wanted to play and practise kink on a regular basis, and it turned into this really fun thing.
Kink was the first time I saw women in positions of power where they could be sexual and powerful at the same time, and that appealed to me. What is dating like in the kink community?
You talk to your partner as much as possible beforehand, throughout and after to make sure everyone is having a lovely experience. It helps if everyone is on the same page.
LP: Communicate openly and early, and play as little of the dating game as possible. They were dating your mask. Open relationships and polyamory are growing in popularity.
What should someone dating doms in mind when deciding whether or not to have an open relationship? LP: Go so slow it feels like you're going backwards. It takes a lot of patience and a lot of work, and most of it is talking about your feelings.
HS: Get really comfortable with setting boundaries. How would you recommend approaching someone you have feelings for?
If you like somebody, tell them. LP: Doing an activity is always better than doing something passive. It reveals more about the other person, and it takes the focus off being on a date.
HS: Life is too short to not go after what you want. Find out what you want, and go get it.